


Who I've Got To Be (BEING REWRITTEN)

by FriendOfTheMarauders



Series: Killjoy Universe [2]
Category: Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys (Album), My Chemical Romance, The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys (Comic)
Genre: AU, Adorable, Angst, Dystopia, Family, Fluff, Gay, Gender Neutral, LGBT, M/M, MCR, Multi, Other, Post-Apocalypse, Trans Male Character, killjoy - Freeform, my chemical romance - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-22
Updated: 2018-02-17
Packaged: 2019-03-08 03:31:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13449621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FriendOfTheMarauders/pseuds/FriendOfTheMarauders
Summary: (WARNING! THIS STORY HAS BEEN DISCONTINUED AND WILL BE REWRITTEN UNDER A DIFFERENT TITLE. THE NEW STORY WILL BE PUBLISHED IN THE KILLJOY UNIVERSE SERIES ALONG WITH THIS ORIGINAL.)Lea had never been normal. He had faked normality, yes, but that didn't work anymore and it was only a matter of time until his luck ran out. His friend was murdured, his mentor distant, and he was stuck with a group of boys who had worse luck than even him. Oh why couldn't he be normal? Why couldn't he be content with those dratted pills and stay out of this?





	1. Out in the open

**Author's Note:**

> If you want to understand the slang in this, I advise reading the Killjoy Dictionary I made. http://archiveofourown.org/works/13652730/chapters/31357383

It was a cold night in Battery City. A cold night indeed. The air was still, but not in a calm way; more like it was a suffocating blanket of chilly particles. Lea shuddered as he gripped the thin cardigan he wore tightly around him as if it would magically grow warmer. He wished he had other clothes than the uniform he and the other kids of the city were forced to wear, but he could not complain. This was better than nothing.  
On his back was a grey rucksack that was used for school, but now contained multiple bottles of water, bland cereal bars, and generic tins of food. Among this was a small half-filled notebook and a pack of five pencils, three of which were quite used up already. Lea knew he shouldn’t have wasted space, but he couldn’t think of a worse fate than being without his beloved notebook and pencils. Well, no. that was wrong. He could, and that was being on those dratted pills again in that godforsaken place, stuck in an endless loop once more and being forced at literal gunpoint to be someone he isn’t.  
It had almost reached that point, and he had to get out. He had to get out and be free.  
The large black boots he had stolen from his father hit the concrete with muffled thuds despite Lea’s attempts to silence them. He would have just worn his old shoes, they would have been quieter, but the boots were better for where he was headed and wouldn’t fit in his bag. The skirt that fell to his knees ruffled in the manufactured wind when he walked, and he ignored the treacherous item as he quickly neared the outskirts of the city. He would easily replace it once he was out. He had heard tales of bodies littering the barren desert outside the city walls, and much as he detested the idea of defiling a corpse, he would have to in order to survive.  
Reaching the walls, Lea almost sighed in relief of how easy it was. He was lucky enough to live in an area of the city that wasn’t as heavily monitored by Dracs and Crows. Even knowing this, however, he would still have to be careful. He knew that in only a few minutes a patrol would be marching up from the horizon and spot him. He searched his bag and took out a long rope with a makeshift hook made from a few wire coat hangers twisted into the correct shape. Twirling the rope about his head, he swung it up and over the tall walls. It fell back to the ground with a clunk. Lea bit his lip and tried again and again, until finally he did it. The hook had latched onto some sort of piping atop the wall and, tugging hard, Lea confirmed that it should hold his weight.  
He took no time in cambering up, pausing briefly when he heard footsteps echo in the distance through the still air. At this, he quickened his pace. When he reached the top, he balled up the rope hurriedly and made to clamber down on the other side. He hooked the rope to the pipes on the desert side of the wall and held tightly. He edged his legs over the concrete and lowered himself down little by little, sweat dripping down his face as he struggled to hold on.  
On the other side of the wall he heard the patrol pass by at a steady pace, and this time he audibly sighed. He was almost free. Just a short distance and he would be on the sandy ground of the desert. On this side Lea could already feel that the air was different. Where in the city it was thick and heavy, here it was thin and freeing. He felt like he could breath for the first time since he was four, and he couldn’t remember those times much.  
Finally, his heavy boots planted themselves on the ground and Lea looked up at his rope. He frowned when he realised he couldn’t get it back down. He fingered it and came up with an idea. He unzipped his bag and fished around in it before taking out an old multitool. It looked to have once been silver in colour, however now it was coated in thin patches of rust and grime. Flicking it open, Lea freed one of the three knifes in the tool and made to saw off a length of rope. It frayed as it was cut and unravelled slightly, allowing Lea to take one of the thinner segments and pocket it.  
A soft breeze blew his long hair gently against his neck and, with his knife now open, he hacked at lock after lock until a pile of brown hair curled around his feet. He replaced the multitool back in his bag and ran a hand through his now short hair. He had been wanting to do that for what seemed like forever. It wasn’t as short as he wanted yet, and he had no idea what it looked like, but he felt it was better than how he previously looked.  
Lea turned away from the wall at last and looked around at the desert he was now in. He shivered and once again clutched his cardigan tightly. He needed new clothes. And fast. Otherwise he would surely die from the cold. Being close to the walls of Battery City he wasn’t feeling the worst of the cold, but Lea was smart enough to know that even a few more metres away and he would end up freezing to death.  
He glanced around at the scene before him and noticed mounds shrouded in darkness littered here and there among the sand. He neared the closest one to him and his eyes widened at the realisation that they were body bags. They were white and had a large black smiley face on them; Better Living industries. Lea knew of these from the guide books he had stolen from his father. They could keep him warm for the night, and maybe he could… borrow… the poor deceased’s clothing.  
Wasting no time, Lea unzipped the body bag, revealing the body of a young man. His face was pale and hidden by a blue half mask. A blue/grey bandanna was tied around his neck and was coated in a light dusting of dirt. He wore a black leather jacket and jeans along with a bloody shirt hiding the wound that must have killed him.  
Tears sprang to Lea’s eyes as he bowed his head at the body. He only seemed young, possibly not even in his twenties yet. He stayed that way for a minute, respectfully wishing their soul to be safe, before he removed the boy from the bag.  
Around ten minutes or so later, Lea was now dressed in the jacket, bandanna, and jeans. He decided to keep his shirt, the boys’ being too bloody and destroyed. He decided to replace the boy back into the body bag and use another one, not wishing the him to suffer humiliation when found for being practically half naked. He constantly muttered apologies as he did so, not bothering to activate the heating on the bag before moving. He couldn’t spend more time in that one spot. Instead he chose a new bag a few feet away and carefully removed the woman from it and hauling the bag over his shoulder so he could find a spot to hide. With another thought, he reached down and took the plain red mask the woman wore and pocketed it before moving on.

Night turned into day and Lea stood out of the bag he was in. His plan had worked and he was not dead. Luck seemed to be in his favour lately. He just hoped it stayed that way for a while. Lea shook his head and balled up the bag, shoving it in his rucksack. He didn’t know when he would need it next. Taking out a bottle of water, he uncapped it and swallowed a mouthful before replacing it. He needed to ration the little resources he had, he didn’t know when he would get more. He didn’t really know anything. He hadn’t any plan from here.  
Now, the thing with not having a plan was that you tend to go with your instincts instead, and for now Lea’s instinct was saying to keep moving away from the walls of the city behind him. For the first half an hour Lea decided to travel at a jog, he wanted to get as far away from the city as he could before the Dracs and Crows started their morning patrols of the zones. After that half hour, Lea slowed. He was out of breath and even though he had stopped every now and then while moving, he wasn’t the fittest person in the world and needed a longer break. Fortunately, the scenery around him had changed from flat plains of sand to a duney landscape where he could hide from unwanted visitors easier than he would have been able to before.  
As he sat down on one of the larger dunes, Lea planted his bag beside him. He leant back and yawned before pulling the bag onto his lap and opening it up. Bringing out a bottle of water, he took a few sips and put it back, trying to ignore the scratch of his throat wanting more or the soft churning of his stomach for food. To distract himself he fished out the rope segment he had cut last night. It was about long enough to braid into a bracelet. It only took five minutes and was fairly simple, but Lea smiled at his handiwork and placed it back into his pocket. He had no way of tying it around his wrist now, the braid was too thick to do that on his own. With that out of the way, Lea sighed. He closed his eyes and breathed in the calm air of the desert. It was peaceful like this. The quiet, the air, the warmth.  
Lea was thrust out of his tranquillity by the roar of an engine drawing nearer. He roughly swung his bag back on his back and crouched low, looking to the direction of the engine, the opposite to where he had come from. Lea relaxed a little, but not fully. It could easily be a BL/ind employee returning late from a night patrol. He watched keenly as the silhouette of a motor bike sped towards him. As is came closer, he noticed that it was quite bright in colour and its rider was wearing a bright blue polka dotted helmet. Lea rose. This wasn’t an immediate threat, maybe they could help. He held out his arm and waved it. The bike gradually slowed and halted a short way off from where Lea was standing. The rider looked to him and tilted his head as if expecting something.  
Lea shifted and walked closer. “Um, excuse me? Could you help me? I just got out of the city and I’m not exactly sure where to go now.” He fiddled with the ends of his jacket and bit his lip.  
After a heavy few moments of silence. the rider got off their bike and advanced towards Lea, who edged backwards a little, reaching his hand in his pocket for his multi tool. The rider was tall, at least a foot taller than Lea, and with the helmet hiding his face he was pretty intimidating to the short sixteen-year-old.  
Lea must have had an odd look on his face as the rider stuck out their hand and laughed, “Cautious, that’s good.” Their voice was muffled by the helmet, but it was loud and bright, like their outfit - consisted of mainly white and decorated with cool blue polka dots and the odd black accessory.  
Lea stared at their hand.  
“Hey, chill kid. I’m not gonna hurt ya. The name’s Show Pony. What’s yours?”  
Lea bit his bottom lip but shook Show Pony’s hand slowly, “L-Lea.”  
“Great to meet you Lea.” They sounded like they were smiling behind the dark visor of their helmet. “So, do ya want a ride? I can take ya to Doctor D. He’ll help ya.”  
“o-okay…” Lea hesitated a little but followed Show Pony to the bike. That was a strange name, he thought. He wanted to ask about it but decided against it. He didn’t want to offend this new ally.  
At his hesitation, Show Pony hopped on their bike and patted behind him. “C’mon kid. Hop on.” They laughed as Lea clambered onto the vehicle behind him clumsily. “Okay kid, your gonna have to hold on to me while we go. Don’t want ya falling off now do we?” Lea nodded and did as he was told as they sped off, Show Pony turning the bike round so they were going back in the direction they had come from.

The time passed, and the sun travelled higher in the sky. Lea supposed it must be late morning now and the heat would have been unbearable were it not for the fact he were speeding through the desert on a motorbike; wind bulleting past and keeping him cool. He didn’t know how long he and Show Pony had been travelling, but he guessed at an hour or two.  
He wasn’t paying much attention when the bike slowed and came to a stop outside a run-down diner. He released Show Pony, who helped him down and led him inside.  
“Hey Doc!” they called out as Lea followed them through a back door that led to a messy room hosting a group of four boys reclining on old looking chairs and an equally old but mismatched sofa. “oh, sup Killjoys. Didn’t know you would be here so early.”  
“Hey Pony,” a lanky boy with vibrant red hair grinned. “Who’s the kid?”  
Lea hid behind Show Pony and clutched the straps of his rucksack nervously.  
“Right,” the tall polka dotted person edged to one side, revealing Lea. They laughed and pushed him forward. “Kid, these are the Killjoys. Guys, this is a kid I found wandering around in zone 2.”  
Lea shuffled his feet and muttered, “Hi.”  
The red head kicked his feet up onto the battered coffee table in front of his chair. “Sup. The name’s Party Poison.” He flashed a lazy grin at Lea.  
“Kobra Kid” offered a boy on the sofa, he had short blonde hair and a thin, angular face, and looked just as lanky as Party Poison.  
“Fun Ghoul” smiled the boy next to Kobra Kid. He had shoulder length greasy black hair that hid half of his face.  
“And I’m Jet Sar.” The last boy nodded, he was leaning against one of the walls by Party Poison’s chair. He sounded moodier than the other boys but still pleasant.  
Now Lea was really curious. Why were the names out here so strange? He shuffled his feet again and opened his mouth to speak, but Show Pony asked where ‘Doctor D’ was.  
“He’s broadcasting.” Jet Star drawled.  
“K. Can you keep an eye on the kid? I need to speak with him.”  
“Sure Show. No prob.” Party poison stretched, “Kobra, Ghoul. Scoot.” The boys on the sofa moved so there was space at one end.  
Show Pony ruffled Lea’s hair and nudged him towards the sofa before exiting the room. Lea nervously removed his bag from his back and sat as close to the end of the sofa as possible, feeling unsure about the boys around him. An awkward silence rang out for a few moments and Lea fished the braided rope from earlier out of his pocket. He frowned when he noticed that it had unravelled. Setting to work fixing it, the boys eyed him. Fun Ghoul, the boy closest to him, finally broke the silence by asking what he was doing.  
Lea held up the rope, it was almost finished, and showed the boy. “Bracelet.” He said simply and, decided he should actually tie it around his wrist this time, held it out to Ghoul. “Could you possibly help? I can’t tie it myself.”  
Fun Ghoul took the braid, smiling, “Sure,” and Lea held his wrist out. He smiled once it was secure and he fiddled with it as he sat in the silence that had returned.  
“Soooo…” Kobra Kid dragged out, “What exactly should we call you? We can’t call you kid cause, ya know, that’s my name.” he laughed awkwardly, attempting to make conversation.  
Lea shrugged noncommittedly, although the question had reminded him of his previous thoughts. “Why exactly do you all have such weird names anyway?”  
The four other boys glanced at each other. “Boy, you haven’t been out here long have you kid?” Party Poison smirked.  
Lea tilted his head in confusion, “I only got free of the city last night.” He explained, and Party poison raised an eyebrow.  
He hummed, thinking. “Well kiddo, us rebels don’t go by our real names. It aint smart. If BL/ind had our names, they would know everything about us.”  
“Oh.” That made sense, Lea thought. “So I guess I should think of something…” he trailed off.  
“Eh, don’t sweat it kid.” Fun Ghoul reached and messed up Lea’s hair like Show Pony had done.  
He frowned. “Don’t do that. I’m not a child.” He ducked his head away from Ghoul.  
“Oh? And how old are you?” Jet Star asked, a smirk on his face.  
“I’m sixteen.” Lea scowled and turned his head away from them and rested it on his hand, which was propped up on the chair of the sofa, hoping the others got the message that he didn’t want to talk anymore. He knew why they must think he was younger, he had been mistaken for an eight-year-old on occasion because of his short stature, soft features and naïve attitude; but it really got on his nerves. No one took him seriously for it and that was a pain.  
“Woah, chill mate.” Kobra Kid reasoned.  
“Yeah,” Ghoul continued, “I’m sorry. I thought you were, like, ten or somethin’”  
Lea turned back and shot the boys with a glare, “Well I’m not.” He snapped and returned to his sulking.  
“If it helps,” Party Poison spoke up, “Ghoulie is only around maybe two or three inches taller than you and he’s 19.” At this, Ghoul whined.  
“Poison” he pouted.  
Kobra kid laughed and Fun Ghoul slugged him in the shoulder, though it was ineffective in shutting the blonde up.  
“Its true Ghoul, you’re a pipsqueak.”  
“You too Jet?” Ghoul raised a hand to his heart and sighed dramatically, “You hurt me, Jet. You really do.”  
Lea couldn’t help the amused laugh from escaping his lips and Ghoul quickly picked up on it.  
He grabbed his shoulder and dragged him to his side, a bemused smile forming on Lea’s face as he was pulled under Ghoul’s arm with a surprised yelp.  
“You and me, eh mate? We can take on these guys. Us shorties gotta stick together yeah?”  
Lea found that, as he looked up at the other boys face, Ghoul’s lopsided grin was contagious and he couldn’t help bit smile. He couldn’t remember the last time that had happened. The expression felt foreign on his face, but, at the same time, welcome.  
He pushed Ghoul away with a laugh, “Sure, shortie squad!” he giggled and the tension in the air that had lingered since he Show Pony left had dissipated.  
Speaking of the tall helmet wearing rebel, they and an older looking man in a wheelchair entered the room. Lea noticed that now Pony was wearing a pair of roller skates and they almost danced as they made their way to his side.  
“Lea, this is Doctor Death Defying. Doc, this is the kid I was talking about.” They introduced and Lea gave a small wave to the handicapped man.  
“Good morning sunshine,” the man greeted, his voice was smooth and jazzy. It relaxed Lea even more and the amused smile lingering on his face changed to that of contentment. “So, my dear, what brings you to the desert?”


	2. I belong

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to my incredible friend Jay for helping me edit this monstrosity.

“Good morning sunshine,” the man greeted, his voice was smooth and jazzy. It relaxed Lea even more and the amused smile lingering on his face changed to that of contentment. “So, my dear, what brings you to the desert?”  
The man held out his hand with a soft, warming smile and Lea gladly shook it.   
“Fed up of being blind and repressed.” He replied with a calm smile.  
“Well child, you need anything, you can always find friends here. We stand for freedom, and no faceless organisation will hold us back.”  
Lea nodded. “Thank you.”  
Doctor Death Defying looked to Show Pony, “Give this one a tour of the place. I want to catch up with my friends here.”   
“K Doc.” Pony grabbed Lea’s hand and pulled him to his feet. “C’mon, this way.” But before they could drag him away, Lea hooked his arm through one of the straps on his bag and swung it onto his back.  
“Okay, Show.” Lea smiled and followed after them.

Around thirty minutes later, Show Pony rolled into the original room with an elegant twirl that distracted the group of old friends from their casual conversation.   
“Hey Pony,” Poison greeted. “You took a while. Where’s the kid?”   
“I left him in the bathroom, suggested he sort out his look. When I left he was looking at my hair dye collection.”   
“Your collection?” Kobra Kid asked, “Geeze, you must really like the squirt.” He smirked.  
Pony shrugged, “We got to chatting. I ended up fixing up his hair. He cut it all off as soon as he was over the wall, ya know. No mirror or nothin. I couldn’t leave it that choppy mess.” They explained. “I told him to try some colour an’ he seemed excited.” They smiled beneath their helmet, “He kinda reminds me of me ya know?”  
“Yeah,” Fun Ghoul nodded, “I got that vibe off the kid too. I remember when you were that age Show.”  
“You were a real handful then,” Doctor D agreed with a fond smile. “It’s nice to see you get along so well with our new friend.”  
For the next half hour or so, the group chatted pleasantly, revelling in the time they could spend together without fear of attack. This sort of thing was a rare occasion, the Killjoys didn’t like to stay in one place too long and most of the time the Doc was busy with his broadcast. Of which, Doc spoke his apologies as he had to return to the airwaves. Pony stood and followed him out of the room, intent on checking up on Lea.  
They knocked on the door of the bathroom and was greeted by a muffled, “Who is it?”  
To which they replied, “It’s just me, Show. How ya doing in there kid?”  
“I’m good,” came Lea’s voice. “You can come in if you want.” He offered, and Show Pony pushed the old door open.   
Stood before them was a damp, but smiling Lea. He was dressed in his boring white shirt and the jeans he had found, his jacket to the side somewhere. The top button of the shirt was undone and looked rather uncomfortable to wear even like that.   
Lea’s hair was messy, stuck up in every direction, and wet. Not soaking wet, but still soggy. Droplets fell onto the shoulders of his shirt and made patches of almost see through material. His new hair cut smelled of dye, but the colours were clear. The shortest side was a dulled red as though the colour had only just taken. A brilliant contrast to the cool toned bands of Lilac-Blue and Spring green that dominated the rest of his head.  
“Liking the stripes kid. Ya remind me of a candy cane. You remember those right?”   
Lea nodded “but weren’t candy canes red and white?”  
“Nah, my mom used to get me multicoloured ones cos I don’t like peppermint.” Show explained. “So,” they looked over their little friend once more, “How’s about we get you a new shirt? That one you have on is so far from life its killing my mood.” They drawled and ordered Lea to stay where he was. After a minute they returned clutching a grey bundle in their arms. They tossed it to Lea, who held it up. It revealed itself to be a light grey tank top with a pink smiley face on it. Thankfully the face wasn’t the BL/ind logo, but a much cuter smile with large eyes; at least, it would be cute if it weren’t for the fact it looked like it was melting.   
Lea’s eyes shone, “Wicked! Are you sure I can wear this Show?” he asked, and his friend nodded.  
“Why else do ya think I gave it to you? I never wear it anymore, too small see.”   
“Thanks Show” Lea grinned and pushed them back out the door so he could change. It only took a few minutes to unbutton his old shirt and replace it with the new top, and when he was ready he tied his bandana around his neck and threw on his jacket. Admiring himself in the grimy, cracked mirror on the back of the door, Lea smiled. The new look suited him, he was glad he looked like a guy- the short hair bringing sharpness to the soft features of his face; and he tank top was baggy enough and the jacket thick enough to hide the fact he didn’t have the flattest of chests.   
Show Pony knocked on the door impatiently. “Oi! Candy!” they called, and Lea, confused, opened it.  
“Candy?” he asked.  
“Ya know, Candy Cane.” Show tried to explain but Lea still looked befuddled. Show sighed. “Its your new nickname. It suits you, doncha think?”  
Lea blinked owlishly, “Er, sure? I guess its cool.” He murmured, and Show grabbed his arm.  
“Perfect.” They grinned beneath their helmet. “Let’s go.” And he dragged his tiny hostage back through to the main room.  
“Wait, my bag!” Lea cried as he was hauled away, before resigning to his fate. 

“Guys, we’re back!” Show pony let go of Lea and spun into the room. Lea laughed at the rebel’s need for dramatics and followed them to the sofa. “So,” Show sounded smug, “How’d you like Candy’s new look?”   
None of the boys seemed to be paying attention. Fun Ghoul was nowhere to be seen, and Jet Star and Kobra were having a pretty animated conversation in the corner of the room.  
“Who’s ‘candy’?” Asked Party Poison from behind a comic book. Show leant over and snatched it out of his grasp and gestured to Lea.   
“Candy. Ya know, the kid.”   
Poison looked at Lea, “So you got a name now then.” He smirked.  
“Apparently,” Lea nodded bashfully and ran his hand through his still damp hair.  
“Cool do” Lea turned to see Fun Ghoul enter the room from outside. He walked over and flopped onto the sofa, bringing the strong smell of cigarette smoke with him, and threw an arm around Lea’s shoulder. The younger boy scrunched his nose up at the smell but muttered a quick “thanks” as he tried to discreetly remove the foreign limb from about him. The arm wouldn’t budge, however, so Lea looked to Show Pony with am annoyed, almost pleading look. He hated the stench emitting from the Killjoy and hoped the helmet wearing teen would help.  
This help came from a quick laugh, “Hey Candy, how about some food?”  
Even though Lea had food in his bag, he took the opportunity to get away from Ghoul and quickly nodded with a thankful smile. “Please”   
Show nodded and sped out of the room, returning with a net bag housing a handful of small, round, red/green items. They removed one and tossed it to Lea, who barely caught it. The boy examined it carefully before his eyes widened in awe. It was an apple.  
“Holy ship” he gasped. “Where did you get them? I haven’t even seen one of these up close since I was four.”  
Show Pony chuckled and threw some to the Killjoys, successfully getting Fun Ghoul to move his arm when he tried to catch the fruit. “It’s amazing what those Better Living pigs throw out. Those psychos are obsessed with perfect, and that includes food. These apples aren’t ‘perfect’. See their odd shapes and colouring?” they explained, and Lea took another look at his apple. It was quite small, and one half seemed more bulbous than the other. As he took a bite, however, a bit juice dribbled down his chin and he moaned softly at the flavour. It was better than anything he had eaten since he could remember. It was crisp and sour, but incredibly sweet. Refreshing.  
“Where did you get them?” he asked again through another mouthful, ignoring the others laughs at his reaction.  
“Bought ‘em” Show shrugged and stowed the bag on a shelf behind them.  
Lea cocked his head in confusion with a raised eyebrow. He hardly believed that Show Pony waltzed up to a BL/ind employee and bought a bag of imperfect apples.  
Party Poison laughed “Some of us runners set up a market a few zones from here. They raid the city every month or so and sell what they find.”  
‘Oh. That made sense.’ Lea thought.   
“Yeah.” Fun ghoul said, “I love that place. Its where I got my tattoos.” He smiled, flexing and showing off the colour on his arms.  
“We always go there when we need stuff, fuel is pretty expensive, but it is a good investment considering how on the move we are.” Jet Star added.  
“They have pretty good comics too.” Kobra pitched in. “They’re old, but great.”  
“Sounds cool,” Lea said, taking yet another bite of his apple and once again marvelling at its flavour.  
Kobra laughed loudly, “Wow mate, you really like apples, don’t ya?”   
Lea nodded and finished off the fruit, even demolishing the core -which made Jet Star look at him oddly-.  
“Well, after so long in that hellhole, Candy would obviously like anything with even a hint of flavour. Remember what we were like?” Party Poison reasoned and looked to Kobra meaningfully, who muttered a ‘true’.  
There was a calm silence. The group just relaxed while they could.   
The silence was broken by Jet Star, who looked to party Poison. “Hey Poison? We should hit the road.” He suggested, nodding to a dusty, cracked clock leaning against the wall on a cabinet. It read 2:37.   
Party shrugged, “In a bit. I think we can stick around for a few more minutes.”  
Jet nodded and leaned back in his corner, Kobra Kid left his side and sat down on a beanbag near Show.  
“So, Pony,” began the blonde. “Where’s Candy gonna be stayin’ then?”   
Lea looked up, startled. Where /was/ he supposed to stay? Would he have to leave and go back to wondering the desert, unprepared and alone? If that was the case, he supposed he could last. But he didn’t really like the idea of leaving Show Pony and Doctor Death Defying, for some reason. He felt safe with them. He already trusted them, and he really didn’t want to go.  
Thankfully, Show Pony stopped Lea’s train of thoughts with a shrug and a “here of course,” as if it was the most obvious thing one could think of.  
“R-really?” Asked Lea, surprised.   
“Well sure kid. You’re one of us now.”


	3. A delightfully danger-free few weeks

Lea had been living with Show Pony and Doctor Death Defying for just over three weeks. The time was calmer than Lea thought it would be, everything he had been told about the “savage wastelands of the zones” had so far been proven wrong. He supposed that all of the city’s propaganda about the zones were just baseless lies meant to keep its citizens scared of leaving, to warn those who refused the pills. 

Lea fiddled with his bracelet as he thought, the rope that had freed him from that place of lies, torment, and mundane repetition. A small smile glanced across his face. He was so happy to be out of there. Here in the zones he was free and accepted, he had people he could trust. True, he had only known them for a few weeks, but they already felt like family. 

Show was the elder sibling he had never had, they taught him how to actually have fun. They showed him their secret stash of candy -a rare thing nowadays- and even let him use their roller skates. Well, he had tried, but they were too big, so he couldn’t really use them. Show also seemed very protective, pushing Lea into learning how to fire a gun “just in case”. Lea really didn’t like the idea of ever hurting anyone, but Show Pony had insisted that life in the zones was tough and that he had to know how to protect himself from any Draculoids or Scarecrows who sought to hurt him. He gave a quick look at the gun Show had given him. It was a standard white blaster that all the BL/ind employees carried, Lea had noticed that the ones the Killjoys had, and the ones Doc and Show had were all decorated with bright colours and, even though he detested the weapon, Lea was tempted to mask the glaring white with brilliant neon. 

Doc was very quickly becoming something of a father figure to Lea. Sure, he had a father already, but after the wars, he had become a BL/ind employee. He was now one of the higher-level Scarecrows and, because of the pills, was never anything like a father to Lea. He was just another mindless drone used by the higher ups of the city. Doctor Death Defying, on the other hand, was a very passionate, caring man. He had gotten ill about a week after Lea arrived at the shack, and during that time he let Lea introduce the broadcast. Show Pony did the actual show, but Lea was the one to greet the rebels that whole week and a half. After Doc got better, Lea still participated in the broadcasts, the man giving him the task of picking some songs and even saying a few lines during the broadcast. 

He looked down at his wrist, above the bracelet of old rope was another with beads and buttons. A gift from Doc. Lea smiled. He had found out that the old man had a lot of time on his hands, Show Pony being the one to run errands and the like due to him being in a wheelchair, and used this time creating. He made the bracelet for Lea a day ago, and had even spruced up his leather jacket by adding bright colours to the collar. The sixteen-year-old wore the jacket with a great grin after Doc returned it to him.   
During the three or so weeks, Lea hung out with the Killjoys very little. They came to the shack probably about once a week, and only for a few hours. Though, whenever they did visit, Lea got to know them well enough to judge their character. 

Poison, it seemed, was the leader. Whatever he said went with little argument and was regarded as important. The red head was calm, he never really paid attention to Lea, and was distant towards him. They interacted, but is seemed the bare minimum compared to his interactions with the others. He smiled a lot, a lopsided grin that gave off the sense he was planning something that only he would ever know about. 

Kobra Kid was the youngest of the Killjoys, being a month younger than Fun Ghoul, and acted like it. He was brighter and bouncier than the others and got on well with Lea. He loved comic books, a trait shared by Party Poison, and raved about them whenever he had an audience. Lea had also learned that the red head was Kobra’s older brother. With this information, he noticed the more affectionate looks Poison gave the younger Killjoy.

Lea couldn’t really say much about Jet Star. The practical twenty-three-year-old was stoic and mature. Where Poison had an air of mischief around him and his calm, Jet had a relaxing aura similar to that of Doc. He was very much like the father of the group and the default leader when Party Poison wasn’t present. Lea could sense that behind the ever present shades and big hair, Jet Star was a very caring individual.

The same could be maybe said about Fun Ghoul, though Lea would say it was buried deep down past the annoying, wild behaviour of the Killjoy. Whenever he was around Ghoul he felt uneasy. The boy didn’t seem to understand the meaning of personal space and had a bit of an affinity for turning bad into worse. He often ran his mouth and would only shut up when fixed a look by Party, Jet, or Doc. Despite this, Lea kind of liked him. He got on with him well enough and had started not to mind the scent that lingered whenever he smoked as Ghoul was nice enough to steer clear of Lea while smoking after he realised the boy didn’t like it.

It was after the Killjoy visits that Lea groaned at. The shack wasn’t the tidiest normally, Show Pony and Doc never caring about the mess, but after the boys were there, the mess would suddenly be unbearable for Lea. He didn’t mind too much mess, he wasn’t really one for cleaning, but when you couldn’t reach the door for the amount of bottles, papers, and all around trash on the floor, then something had to be done. And so, Lea had taken on the role as cleaner on the days after the Killjoys. He didn’t mind so much, knowing that he could give up any time and no one would care. But it made him smile at being able to make Doc’s life easier, the mess on the floor made wheeling around the shack and diner hard, and Lea knew the man appreciated the cleaner atmosphere.

There was a knock on the door. Lea shared a room with Show, and they knew he didn’t mind if they came in unannounced, but the polka dotted teen always knocked anyway.   
“Come in,” Lea called out and Show entered. They weren’t wearing their helmet, revealing a mess of dirty blonde hair and a pale, pointed face. It was a rare thing to find Show Pony without their helmet on, but Lea had seen them this way a few times before; namely at night.  
“Hey Candy.” They greeted, the nickname still sounding foreign to Lea, even after weeks of being addressed by it. Show reclined on the bed across from Lea.   
“Hey Show.” Lea smiled and looked up from the notebook he had been absentmindedly drawing in. he wasn’t very good, but the random doodles were fun to draw and relaxed him. In the time he had been in the zones, he had fully used up two of his already half-finished pencils. This saddened him, but he remembered Show telling him about the rebel market and hoped maybe he could get some more. He hadn’t had the chance to ask yet, always forgetting, but now, “Um, Show?”  
“Yeah kiddo?”  
“I’m running out of pencils,” he mentioned and held up the mostly worn pencil he was currently using. Show gave a small sympathetic look.  
“That’s a shame kid,” he smiled cheekily, “It’s cause you don’t put that book down. You draw too much.” He laughed and Lea glared playfully. “Well, we’ve been needing to get more supplies anyway. The angel cakes that pass through here keep us happy enough when we’re low, but we really do need to restock.”  
Lea remembered the so called “Angel Cakes”. They were usually pleasant rebels who wore bright smiles and carried sweet treats. They sold food to those who needed it, and had made rounds to the “Dr’s Office”, as the shack was dubbed, a handful of times since Lea had started living there. Some of these angels had candy, something he and Show couldn’t resist, so they ended up using a lot of carbons on the rare treats, much to Doc’s annoyance. “Don’t become spongeheads on me now.” He would mutter at these times, which only made the two laugh.  
“But if I’m letting you tag along, we need to sort you out with a mask. Identity is a powerful thing out here, you have a name, but if someone knows your face who isn’t friendly, then you can kiss that power goodbye.” Show asserted, their protective nature surfacing.  
Lea furrowed his brows, “But I’ve met plenty of people and they know my face.”  
“Yes,” Show admitted, “But the market place is out in the open. A cloud of dracs could show up at any point, or BL/ind spy could be hanging around. You never know in places like that.” They explained. Lea personally thought it was ridiculous, who was to say that those he had already met weren’t spies? And with so many people, one small kid wasn’t gonna be recognised. But instead of protesting, he sighed and nodded. 

He walked over to his rucksack, which was by his gun on an old desk near the door. He pulled out the dull red half mask he had taken from that poor woman when he had escaped the city. He still didn’t know why he saw fit to take it, but it seemed to come in handy here.  
“Will this do?” he asked, holding it up and showing Show Pony, who looked it over and nodded.  
“Its painfully boring, but it’ll do I suppose.”   
“Boring?” asked Lea.  
“Well, yeah. Plain red. So dull.”  
“So? Shouldn’t that be a good thing? Less recognisable.”  
Show pouted, “But that’s what you want them to remember. Your mask. It’s a ‘fuck you, I’m still alive’ sort of thing. You want to make them remember you, so they know its you who keeps spitting in their eye.”  
Lea deadpanned, “That makes no sense at all Show.”  
Show Pony rolled their eyes and stood, searching around for something. They finally held up a black sharpie marker triumphantly. He handed it to Lea. “Draw something on it.” They ordered, and Lea just gave them a look. “Go on, you know you want to.”  
Lea sighed and took the marker. “Fine.”   
He simply drew blocky lines underneath the eye holes in the mask, they looked like black pixelated tears. Above the eyes he drew another blocky line centrally above each. He tossed the sharpie to Show and held up the mask. “Happy?”  
They nodded. “Much better, but it could do with…” he snatched the mask from Lea, to his protests, and quickly drew a triangle pointing down on the nose of the mask before handing it back. Lea had to admit, it did feel a lot better with the new markings.  
He placed it over his eyes and looked at the older teen. “How do I look?”  
Show grinned, “You look good.”  
Lea nodded and had a thought, he pulled the grey/blue bandanna he always wore up and it stayed in place over his nose. Show’s grin grew, and they ruffled Lea’s hair.  
“Perfect.”


End file.
